| Off Topic Humor A designated place for Jokes, Riddles, & humorous stuff in general. |
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12-16-2009, 03:40 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by bdaw
The world is over....
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Mythbusters busted that one a couple years ago.
Sir Bonzo, Court Jester
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set type=m6
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12-16-2009, 04:53 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by boxboss
Mythbusters busted that one a couple years ago.
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aaww come on....
What season was that? I have 1-3 and didn't see it.
My car isn't dirty...It just hasn't been D!Tailed.
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. -- Winston Churchill
Governments don't reduce deficits by raising taxes on the people; governments reduce deficits by controlling spending and stimulating new wealth. -- Ronald Reagan
The taxpayer: that's someone who works for the federal government, but doesn't have to take a civil service examination. -- Ronald Reagan
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Knight with Platinum Spurs
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12-17-2009, 05:22 AM
Still funny...
<E>
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Super Duper Moderator
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12-17-2009, 04:27 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by bdaw
aaww come on....
What season was that? I have 1-3 and didn't see it.
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I don't remember, but they did...in usual MB fashion. The sun didn't do the trick, so they put lots of heat lamps on the car...total dud.
Sir Bonzo, Court Jester
2008 ///M6 Cabrio Monaco Blue|Sepang Merino|Maderia Walnut|SMG III|HUD|CA|EPS|V1
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set type=m6
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12-18-2009, 01:25 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by boxboss
I don't remember, but they did...in usual MB fashion. The sun didn't do the trick, so they put lots of heat lamps on the car...total dud.
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ha ha ha ha - that would make a good joke...almost as good as the red neck fire alarm
My car isn't dirty...It just hasn't been D!Tailed.
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. -- Winston Churchill
Governments don't reduce deficits by raising taxes on the people; governments reduce deficits by controlling spending and stimulating new wealth. -- Ronald Reagan
The taxpayer: that's someone who works for the federal government, but doesn't have to take a civil service examination. -- Ronald Reagan
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set type=m6
Posts: 5,302
Join Date: Jul 2007
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12-21-2009, 07:35 AM
My car isn't dirty...It just hasn't been D!Tailed.
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. -- Winston Churchill
Governments don't reduce deficits by raising taxes on the people; governments reduce deficits by controlling spending and stimulating new wealth. -- Ronald Reagan
The taxpayer: that's someone who works for the federal government, but doesn't have to take a civil service examination. -- Ronald Reagan
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set type=m6
Posts: 5,302
Join Date: Jul 2007
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07-18-2010, 10:11 PM
The last line is the best!
My car isn't dirty...It just hasn't been D!Tailed.
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. -- Winston Churchill
Governments don't reduce deficits by raising taxes on the people; governments reduce deficits by controlling spending and stimulating new wealth. -- Ronald Reagan
The taxpayer: that's someone who works for the federal government, but doesn't have to take a civil service examination. -- Ronald Reagan
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The Demanding Knight with Titanium Spurs
Posts: 2,440
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Houston,TX.
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07-19-2010, 03:41 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by bdaw
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It's good to see you and your car in that commercial B! 
Lord Houston , Duke of Petrol, Slayer of the Unwashed Key-Wielding Infidels!
2006 650i Coupe - Jet Black/Black interior, Sports Package,Logic-7 Premium Sound, Sirius Satellite Radio, Ruthenium pearl-gloss finish interior trim, 6-speed STEPTRONIC transmission, LoJack.
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D!Tail Guru
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Location: Salt Lake City, Utah
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07-22-2010, 07:41 AM
We've all heard about people having Guts or Balls, but do you really know the difference between them? There is a medical distinction between Guts and Balls. In an effort to keep you informed, here are the definitions:
GUTS - Is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being met by your wife with a broom, and having the Guts to ask: 'Are you still Cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?'
BALLS - Is coming home late after a night out with the guys, smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the Balls to say: 'You're next, Chubby.'
I hope this clears up any confusion on the matter.
Medically speaking, there is no difference in the outcome. Both result in death.
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Knight with Platinum Spurs
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07-22-2010, 09:59 AM
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set type=m6
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07-22-2010, 01:42 PM
Ramp, can you validate this?
My car isn't dirty...It just hasn't been D!Tailed.
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. -- Winston Churchill
Governments don't reduce deficits by raising taxes on the people; governments reduce deficits by controlling spending and stimulating new wealth. -- Ronald Reagan
The taxpayer: that's someone who works for the federal government, but doesn't have to take a civil service examination. -- Ronald Reagan
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The Demanding Knight with Titanium Spurs
Posts: 2,440
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Houston,TX.
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07-23-2010, 05:13 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by D!Tailed
We've all heard about people having Guts or Balls, but do you really know the difference between them? There is a medical distinction between Guts and Balls. In an effort to keep you informed, here are the definitions:
GUTS - Is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being met by your wife with a broom, and having the Guts to ask: 'Are you still Cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?'
BALLS - Is coming home late after a night out with the guys, smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the Balls to say: 'You're next, Chubby.'
I hope this clears up any confusion on the matter.
Medically speaking, there is no difference in the outcome. Both result in death.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bdaw
Ramp, can you validate this?
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Lord Houston , Duke of Petrol, Slayer of the Unwashed Key-Wielding Infidels!
2006 650i Coupe - Jet Black/Black interior, Sports Package,Logic-7 Premium Sound, Sirius Satellite Radio, Ruthenium pearl-gloss finish interior trim, 6-speed STEPTRONIC transmission, LoJack.
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set type=m6
Posts: 5,302
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07-23-2010, 08:34 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by commencer
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Ramp is a Dr. At least that's what he told Boxy last time they were in the woods together.
My car isn't dirty...It just hasn't been D!Tailed.
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. -- Winston Churchill
Governments don't reduce deficits by raising taxes on the people; governments reduce deficits by controlling spending and stimulating new wealth. -- Ronald Reagan
The taxpayer: that's someone who works for the federal government, but doesn't have to take a civil service examination. -- Ronald Reagan
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Super Duper Moderator
Posts: 5,233
Join Date: Jun 2007
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07-24-2010, 05:11 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by bdaw
Ramp is a Dr. At least that's what he told Boxy last time they were in the woods together.
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Sir Bonzo, Court Jester
2008 ///M6 Cabrio Monaco Blue|Sepang Merino|Maderia Walnut|SMG III|HUD|CA|EPS|V1
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The Demanding Knight with Titanium Spurs
Posts: 2,440
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Houston,TX.
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07-27-2010, 06:02 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by bdaw
Ramp is a Dr. At least that's what he told Boxy last time they were in the woods together.
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So that's why Boxy was walking funny...
Lord Houston , Duke of Petrol, Slayer of the Unwashed Key-Wielding Infidels!
2006 650i Coupe - Jet Black/Black interior, Sports Package,Logic-7 Premium Sound, Sirius Satellite Radio, Ruthenium pearl-gloss finish interior trim, 6-speed STEPTRONIC transmission, LoJack.
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Knight, Sir Specs
Posts: 818
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Tampa FL
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07-27-2010, 06:49 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by D!Tailed
We've all heard about people having Guts or Balls, but do you really know the difference between them? There is a medical distinction between Guts and Balls. In an effort to keep you informed, here are the definitions:
GUTS - Is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being met by your wife with a broom, and having the Guts to ask: 'Are you still Cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?'
BALLS - Is coming home late after a night out with the guys, smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the Balls to say: 'You're next, Chubby.'
I hope this clears up any confusion on the matter.
Medically speaking, there is no difference in the outcome. Both result in death.
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I'm sending this to my wife
LMAO!
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Super Duper Moderator
Posts: 5,233
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07-27-2010, 05:43 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by commencer
So that's why Boxy was walking funny...
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Sir Bonzo, Court Jester
2008 ///M6 Cabrio Monaco Blue|Sepang Merino|Maderia Walnut|SMG III|HUD|CA|EPS|V1
2008 750Li Alpine White|Natural Brown|Light Ash|LS|PS|CP|CA|Style 231 Wheels
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M DE Nov '09
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BMW ToD Dragon Slayer '07
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set type=m6
Posts: 5,302
Join Date: Jul 2007
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07-27-2010, 07:08 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by boxboss
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I'm not touching that one.
My car isn't dirty...It just hasn't been D!Tailed.
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. -- Winston Churchill
Governments don't reduce deficits by raising taxes on the people; governments reduce deficits by controlling spending and stimulating new wealth. -- Ronald Reagan
The taxpayer: that's someone who works for the federal government, but doesn't have to take a civil service examination. -- Ronald Reagan
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The Demanding Knight with Titanium Spurs
Posts: 2,440
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Houston,TX.
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07-28-2010, 07:16 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by boxboss
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 So you like the doc to double check, huh??
Quote:
Originally Posted by bdaw
I'm not touching that one.
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Lord Houston , Duke of Petrol, Slayer of the Unwashed Key-Wielding Infidels!
2006 650i Coupe - Jet Black/Black interior, Sports Package,Logic-7 Premium Sound, Sirius Satellite Radio, Ruthenium pearl-gloss finish interior trim, 6-speed STEPTRONIC transmission, LoJack.
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set type=m6
Posts: 5,302
Join Date: Jul 2007
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07-28-2010, 08:09 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by commencer
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My car isn't dirty...It just hasn't been D!Tailed.
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. -- Winston Churchill
Governments don't reduce deficits by raising taxes on the people; governments reduce deficits by controlling spending and stimulating new wealth. -- Ronald Reagan
The taxpayer: that's someone who works for the federal government, but doesn't have to take a civil service examination. -- Ronald Reagan
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CTS-V Lover Kangaroo Scrotum Leather Fabricator and Knight with Piano Black Spurs
Posts: 1,764
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07-28-2010, 04:26 PM
What do you call a whore with a runny nose?
Full.
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CTS-V Lover Kangaroo Scrotum Leather Fabricator and Knight with Piano Black Spurs
Posts: 1,764
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07-28-2010, 04:27 PM
Women are like a frying pan. Before you stick the fat in, you need to warm it up.
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set type=m6
Posts: 5,302
Join Date: Jul 2007
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07-28-2010, 11:38 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by InsidiousSpeed
What do you call a whore with a runny nose?
Full.
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you got something handing out of your nose.
My car isn't dirty...It just hasn't been D!Tailed.
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. -- Winston Churchill
Governments don't reduce deficits by raising taxes on the people; governments reduce deficits by controlling spending and stimulating new wealth. -- Ronald Reagan
The taxpayer: that's someone who works for the federal government, but doesn't have to take a civil service examination. -- Ronald Reagan
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The Demanding Knight with Titanium Spurs
Posts: 2,440
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Houston,TX.
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07-29-2010, 05:48 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by bdaw
you got something handing out of your nose.
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Assuming you meant hanGing...
Lord Houston , Duke of Petrol, Slayer of the Unwashed Key-Wielding Infidels!
2006 650i Coupe - Jet Black/Black interior, Sports Package,Logic-7 Premium Sound, Sirius Satellite Radio, Ruthenium pearl-gloss finish interior trim, 6-speed STEPTRONIC transmission, LoJack.
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Super Duper Moderator
Posts: 5,233
Join Date: Jun 2007
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08-14-2010, 09:28 AM
I don't know if this is the right place to post this. It's humor, but very serious...
(be advised, for mature audiences only)
Sir Bonzo, Court Jester
2008 ///M6 Cabrio Monaco Blue|Sepang Merino|Maderia Walnut|SMG III|HUD|CA|EPS|V1
2008 750Li Alpine White|Natural Brown|Light Ash|LS|PS|CP|CA|Style 231 Wheels
Sharkfest/ToD 2010
M DE Nov '09
BMW ToD Dragon Slayer '09
BimmerDrivers 2nd Anniversary - Chicago - June '09
Sharkfest/ToD 2009
M DE Nov '08
BMW ToD Dragon Slayer '08
BimmerDrivers 1st Anniversary - Las Vegas - June '08
Sharkfest/ToD 2008
BMW ToD Dragon Slayer '07
Sharkfest/ToD 2007
BMW ToD Dragon Slayer '06
Sharkfest 2006
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